Sermon Prepared by James McCullen
Email Preach Him with Dr. Jim

Role Models for Husbands and Wives.
1 Pet 3:1-7 NASB
I received help for this sermon from Sermon Central at:  http://www.newcreations.net/sermoncentral/z1pet.htm#3

1 In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any {of them} are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, 2 as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. 3 And let not your adornment be {merely} external-- braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses;    4 but {let it be} the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God. 5 For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands. 6 Thus Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear. 7 You husbands likewise, live with {your wives} in an understanding way, as with a weaker vessel, since she is a woman; and grant her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered. (NAS)

Introduction
In 1 Peter we have been taught the significance of a submissive attitude for all in the  Christian family. In the text today we center more on the statement concerning a wives submission to her husband and the husbands duty to his wife.

This necessity of the wife to submit herself to the husband's authority has been blown up to undue proportions. Dwelling on that aspect of it is like disliking roses because they have thorns -- they also are very beautiful and have delightful fragrance.

I have heard a woman pastor, and some men say "Paul held what we would consider sexist views of women." Paul was a man of his time and that he never meant his statements about women to become the basis for the teaching of the entire church.

They use the scripture verse in Gal 3:28 to persuade us to their view. It says "    There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free man, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus. (NAS) That verse is talking about salvation not roles for male and female. Further we must ask "did Paul know what he was writing about? " He repeats the same instruction in two more of his epistles. In addition the book of Galatians was written before Ephesians, and Colossians. (See chart below.)

Our text is in the book of 1 Peter. It was written after the book of Galatians. The case against the idea of submission as part of the role model for ladies in my opinion is not valid. It is especially not valid through the use of the verses in Galatians.

                            Galatians Written        48-57
                            Ephesians Written       61-63
                            Colossians written       61-63
                            1 Peter Written          63-65

Lets look further at the text and the :

The Attitude . . of the Wives Role Model.
The Adornment. . of the Wives Role Model.
The Attitude . . of the Husbands Role Model.
 
 

1.    The Attitude . . of the Wives Role Model. v 1-2


A.    The Required Attitude. v 1
        1. Require for God to be pleased.
1 In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any {of them} are disobedient to the word, . . . "
        a.    In the same way used 2 times in the text. v 1 & 7
        b.    God has ordered the role models.
        c.    Jesus set the example.

1 Cor 11:3 But I want you to understand that Christ is the head of every man, and the man is the head of a woman, and God is the head of Christ. (NAS)

Gen 3:16
16 To the woman He said, "I will greatly multiply Your pain in childbirth, in pain you shall bring forth children; yet your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you." (NAS)

Eph 5:22 Wives, {be subject} to your own husbands, as to the Lord. (NAS)

Col 3:18 Wives, be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. (NAS)

1 Cor 15:27-28 27 For He has put all things in subjection under His feet. But when He says, "All things are put in subjection," it is evident that He is excepted who put all things in subjection to Him. 28 And when all things are subjected to Him, then the Son Himself also will be subjected to the One who subjected all things to Him, that God may be all in all. (NAS)

Eph 1:22
22 And He put all things in subjection under His feet, and gave Him as head over all things to the church, (NAS)

    2. Require for Woman to be pleased.

Illustration
In July 1998 Entertainer Barbara Streisand married boyfriend James Brolin at the actress' three-home seaside Malibu compound, as helicopters lattered overhead and a phalanx of reporters clustered on a country road near by.

In an interview with Barbara Walters Ms Streisand said "I can't believe he means so much to me. The other night in the Swimming Pool I look up at him and said to my self I am looking at the world from his shoulders."

Now I don't agree with much of what I know about Barbara Strissand but I do think she has every right to be happy. She is saying I have a man I can look up to, and now I am happy, happier than I have ever been. Maybe she has a Biblical view without even knowing it.

Illustration
In 1989 God called us to this church. We had a home in West Virginia that we had to sell. My yearly salary package in West Virginia was $12,000.00 more than here. Here I live in a parsonage, there I had to pay for the house etc, from that additional money. Many of you know my house did not sell for 41/2 years. Christa at times would say we can't do it.

As the head of the house I said "Christa this is my responsibility, and God will take care of it. Let's focus on the truth of God's call to be here." God took cake and Christa got peace.

    3.    Require for Man to be pleased.
                a.    You cause man to be happiest.

Illustration
Before I got married I lived with my mom. I had a room all by myself, and it was a mess. Christa came into my room one time, and found 12 pairs of pants hanging on the corner of the door. She couldn't imagine why I didn't hang them up, then she looked into the closet, and saw the mess there.

She has put order in my life. In fact I call her Tidy Tilly. I heard a joke about a man who married a woman who had never been marries before. She had lived alone for many years. One night this man got up to go to the bath room, and she made his bed before he got back. My wife is like that.  But my life is more orderly and there is a loveliness,  and beauty because of her.
 

B.    The Reason for the Attitude. v 1 b
". . . they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives,"

        1.    There is an evangelistic reason.

C.    The Respect of the Attitude. v 2
" as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior."

Illustration
Here is a paragraph from Ashley Montague on The Triumph and Tragedy of the American Woman, which appeared in the Saturday Review.

Women have great gifts to bring to the world of men, the qualities of love, compassion and humanity (that is, beauty of spirit). It is the function of women to humanize since women are the natural mothers of humanity. Women are by nature endowed with the most important of all adaptive traits -- the capacity to love -- and this it is their principal function to teach men. There can be no more important function. It could be wished that both men and women understood this.

Application

This role model really hinges on a woman's attitude.   Do you want God's way or the worlds?
 
 

2.    The Adornment. . of the Wives Role Model. v 3-6 


A.    The Correcting Word about Adornment. v 3
And let not your adornment be {merely} external-- braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses;
 

B.    The Constructive Word about Adornment. v 4
4 but {let it be} the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God.
 

C.    The Contributing Word about Adornment. v 5-6
5 For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands. 6 Thus Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear.

Illustration
Sarah was strikingly beautiful. One of the most amazing things ever recorded about women was written about this woman. At the age of sixty-five she was taken by Pharaoh of Egypt for his harem, when Abraham her husband had foolishly jeopardized her safety by a lie that she was his sister.

The amazing thing is that this whole thing was repeated again under Abimelech, the King of the Philistines, when Sarah was ninety years old! What an amazingly beautiful woman she must have been. When she died at the age of 127, Abraham was simply inconsolable. He wept and mourned for Sarah for days.

Application

Ladies are you working on the inner quality of your life as well as the outward beauty?
 
 

3.    The Attitude . . of the Husbands Role Model. v 7


Introduction
Every time the Bible mentions a role for one sex it mentions a role for the other sex, God is not showing partiality.

On one occasion I talked with two Amish girls. I asked them about their roles and submissive lifestyles. I then asked how would you like to be men rather than ladies? They immediately and forcefully said no way. They preferred their role to the mans.
 

A.    The Required. Attitude. v 7 a
        7 You husbands likewise, live with {your wives} in an understanding way, . . . "

Illustration
A man was watching a TV show once where the father and the son are waiting for the mother and daughter to come home. And the father is trying to teach the boy about women. He says, "I know that if you compliment them, good things will happen." "Like what?" says the boy. The father than has an image of his wife mowing the lawn while he lays on a hammock. "Oh just good stuff you will learn about when you are older." Just then the mother and daughter walk in having gone to the hair salon. "Wow, you guys look great," begins the father. "Yeah, I have never seen you both look so beautiful," continues the son. Basking in the compliments, the mother and daughter say that they will be cooking a special dinner for their two special guys tonight. "You see," says the dad, looking at his son. "Wow, it really does work! Tell me more about women dad," the son says with a new found respect for his father. "That's all I know."
 

B.    The Respect of the Attitude. v 7 b
        ". . . as with a weaker vessel, since she is a woman; and grant her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, . . . "

            1.    This is physical weakness, comparatively.
 

C.    The Reason of the Attitude.. v 7 c
        ". . . so that your prayers may not be hindered. (NAS)

        1.    Men how is your prayer life?   Could it be better.  There may be a hinderance because of your relationship with your wife.

Illustration
Johnny Oates is the manager of the Texas Rangers baseball club.   He got this job, and was truly focused on it when his wife had a breakdown.  What is Oates to do his wife's breakdown came just as the season began. He went and asked for a leave of absence. The team owners and players stood by him, and told him how much they respected his decision.

He got elected the manager of the year in the next season. He is a dedicated Christian.
 

Illustration
Behind every great man there is a surprised mother in law,   and a great lady.

Abraham is one of the great names in Scripture; in fact, he is one of the universal names of mankind. Abraham is honored by three of the great religions of the world. His name is known all over the earth and is one of the very few names that can claim such distinction.

The Scripture is surely suggesting here that the greatness of this man is due, in part, to the wonderful wife he had. She set an example for women everywhere. Like him, she entered into the life of faith and became one of the very few women to be listed in the record of the heroes of faith in
 

Application

Husbands,   you have a role model to follow.    Usually the wife will be obedient to the teaching of scripture before the husband.  But lets work toward both of us being obedient,

Amen?  Amen!